Title: Without a Paddle
Notes: Written for the 2009 "Twisting the Twilight Zone" challenge (enter_tzone) for the prompt "The Fever"
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Gen, H/C, Action/Adventure
Word Count: ~10,300
Characters: Rodney McKay, John Sheppard
Warnings: A teensy bit of language, maybe? Unrepetant H/C?
Spoilers: Takes place sometime between "Quarantine" and "Midway", so anything up to 4x17 is fair game.
Thanks: To my beta, twit1217, who is 100% concentrated awesomesauce for not only helping me keep the world safe from my atrocious grammar and cavity-inducing schmoop, but for also staying up late and waking up early to help me with this. You are my shining star. A special thanks also goes to sgatazmy, who helped me find the proper plot thread in this, uh, slightly non-linear gem. And also a thank you to danceswithgary for the multiple deadline extensions.

ETA: Now with an awesome cover by danceswithgary :D

Summary: Rodney should have known that the mission was going to suck the moment he stepped through the Stargate, took in a deep breath of the fresh, clean mountain air—and swallowed a fly.

( Sadly, that's the high point of his day. )

The day you all have been waiting for has arrived.

All right, perhaps all of you haven't been waiting. Perhaps just twelve of you. Regardless of the number of people waiting, the day has arrived. What day is that? Why, it's the first of...



T'is the season of giving, receiving, and holiday cheer. And in that spirit, I have written* a few short stories for various members of my f-list (and one sneaky Rawhide fan) based on prompts given back at the end of August. So for the next twelve days, there will be one ficlet for each participant. * - All right, all right, I've fallen way behind, so a good portion of them are still in progress. But I will persevere to get the gifts out in time!

First up is a ficlet for my good friend...



Spoilers for SGA Season 4, up to "Spoils of War"

( On the first day of Ficmas, my Greyias gave to me... )

( Prompt )

This morning, jadesfire2808 asked a very important question:

So where's my AU where Rodney and John are 9 and have an *actual* clubhouse, huh? Maybe a treehouse with a rope ladder and no girls allowed (except Teyla, of course, cos she can beat them all up and they're too scared to kick her out).

Where is it, hmmm? ;)

It was a question that I felt compelled to give her an answer to. This turned out about how my answers usually do. Cracky, with a side-order of snark. Oops?

Title: The East Pier Boys
Rating: G
Genre: Comment!Fic, Crack, AU, Kid!Fic, Humor... pick one
Word Count: ~1200
Characters: Team Dork

( Somewhere, high above the vacant lot on East Pier Street... )

( Part One )
( Part Two )

Sad news today... kind of ironic that it came out the same day I finished this. Heh.

Title: Penitence
Rating: PG
Genre: Gen, Angst, Introspection
Word Count: ~4000
Theme number: #2 - Unfamiliar Territory
Character(s): Rodney McKay
Beta: twit1217, who without... I would make very little sense. I ♥ my beta! Any remaining mistakes, afraid they're all me.
Spoilers: Huge honking and flashing their lights spoilers for "Miller's Crossing"
Summary: It's not penance, because oh, that'd be the kind of afterlife he'd want if he was apt to believe in that sort of thing. Need to atone for your sins? Drink a Molson's, we'll call it even. (Tag for "Miller's Crossing")


(The guilty one is not he who commits the sin, but the one who causes the darkness.)

Definitely not my usual comedic, snarky affair.

And I know I have like another few days of vacation to squee and flail about, but upon my return to my humble abode I woke up... well, not sick as a dog, but I am definitely not in the land of sunshine and lollipops. I'd go to a doctor, but the last time I did that when I felt really under the weather he was all "Oh, I am diagnosing you with a runny nose!" and I just about punched him in the runny nose, so I think I'll prescribe myself sleep and leave it at that.

But, Monday, other than the draggy things, was very cool, as it was gateverse_remix reveal day!

I got assigned leesa_perrie, who it was very hard to not slip up and reveal that to (although she probably totally guessed it at some point). I'd like to say that it took me a really hard time to figure out what I wanted to remix, but I've always been a little bit in love with her Cousins Series, and I got bit with the image of John trying to teach Rodney to drive, and somehow that morphed into...

Driver's Ed (An Annoying Cousin, the Dukes of Hazzard Remix) (~4,200 words)
PG, gen, AU - Remix of leesa_perrie's An Annoying Cousin
Like every new life experience, Rodney McKay had been absolutely terrified, and it was John's duty as the older, more responsible sibling... cousin—to impart the wisdom of the older generation.

On the flip side, dossier was assigned to me, and did a wonderful, awesome, and "I really wish I had thought of that" remix of "No Traveller Returns", documenting the further adventures of the RepliTeam, and a really interesting and chilling twist on the end of my fic that makes a lot of sense after watching "Be All My Sins Remember'd": No Traveller Returns (the Look Homeward, Angel remix)

I still haven't worked my way through everything that's been posted, but I did manage to read xparrot's Any Port in a Storm (Cold Winds, Hot Air remix), which is Ronon and Rodney stuck in a blizzard, chock full o' h/c and I cannot stress the awesomeness of the dialogue. Just about every single one of Rodney's lines is a gem, and the Ronon voice is spectacular.

Ah, April has been such a great month due to the backbreaking efforts of friendshipper, whose hard work has brought us all of the wonderful stories for the first, maybe (hope hope hope) annual sga_genficathon. Not only did she run the comm, post the stories, and ride herd on the authors, but she wound up writing four very awesome stories, one of which has me itching to write a western AU.

(I'm talking about The Great Pegasus Train Robbery, by the by. Go, read, enjoy.)

I wound up writing two myself, both in the humor genre. You're all shocked, I know.

Into the Woods - Which really should be titled "The Ransom of Rodney McKay". I did not intentionally base it on the O. Henry story, "The Ransom of Red Chief", but the idea behind the story cracked me up too much to not try. Zorin, the kidnapper named after a James Bond villain, actually came away from the experience far more whole than I was originally intending to: I really wanted to work in swinging crushing logs, collapsing rope bridges, and Indiana Jones sized boulders in, but alas those seemed too far fetched. Another time, dear Zorin, another time.

The Physicist Bride - A pinch hit for the "self-sacrifice" prompt. Combination of one of my original ideas for the above prompt, and shamelessly inspired by Don Juan McKay and Other Universal Improbabilities by liketheriverrun (I KNEW IT SOTER! DO YOU HEAR ME?) Rodney and his numerous footnotes took over before I could have him and the rest of the team run rampant over the streets of not!Agrabah and make gratuitous Disney references, but I did manage to work in that chandelier swinging action I've been wanting to do for over a year now. Ah, good times.

Aaaaand now... I ought to pick up Big Bang again, but part of me wants to see if I can't finish my first two ficathon attempts that just kept insisting on jumping genres and see if I can't get them posted before April's up.

(Part One)
(Part Two)